Well Up

by grown honesty well

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a frenetic eruption of urban blues and sleepy quests

first-year-out-of-college songs that were revisited and rerecorded during the winter of my second year out of college (with friends!)


released March 24, 2015

the players: Patrick Budde, Beth Hyland, Justin Leider, Will Sonheim

Patrick - keyboard, melodica, acoustic guitar, electric guitar, violin, banjo, backup vocals and harmonies

Beth - glockenspiel, acoustic guitar, backup vocals and harmonies

Justin - ukulele, acoustic guitar, lead vocals and static

Will - drum pad, drumsticks, djembe, claps, melodica, melty pad, backup vocals and harmonies

recorded live in Patrick's living room in a single evening very quickly

all songs by Justin Leider
recorded and produced by Patrick Budde
album artwork by Corinne Bass

thank you for being alive
please keep it up


all rights reserved



grown honesty well New York, New York

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Track Name: Saul Good
there's so much to do
and there's so much to say
and there's so much to think about
at the end of the day

I was good, no
Track Name: Nothing and Everything
I wanna travel the world
meet all the boys and girls
I wanna grow my curls
not a care in the world

I want it all to be done
I want to do it again
I want to have some fun
if I can handle it

I want it all to mean
what I think it means
as much as a dream
shapes reality

do I try for one
do I have a choice
I’ll wait all night long
just to hear your voice
Track Name: Desperate Times
I’m trying to justify whatever pain I feel
with some bullshit philosophy that isn’t real
all because I fell in love with no one to love me back
so here I am screaming in this dusty shack
rotting out my vocal cords until they spew black

I stole these chords from someone else
I felt obliged to write a second verse
but I don’t really have much else to say
but of course I do, it’s just jammed in my brain
and at the end of the day it’s all the same

I tried to pin how I feel on you
as if you’re the one who wasn’t pulling through
but now I see that there’s a push and a pull
and when we get tired there’s a natural lull
so I’m learning to stay awake in spite of it all

I hope I am not the only one
Track Name: Glacier
I stalk the hall
I shake the floor
I punch the wall
I break the door

I curse the mall
I waste the spore
I scrape the stall
I taste the gore

and I want you to call me
I want you to tease me
it would appall me
it would appease me

you and me
frozen sea
waiting to move

and I need you to serve me
I need you to blind me
it will unnerve me
it will unwind me

you and me
frozen sea
desperate to move

you and me
arctic sheen
when will we move
Track Name: Outpour
I shouldn't feel like I can't say what it is I want to say
Track Name: City Boy
he was a man without a plan
searching for whatever felt nice
he roamed the halls and stalked the land
trying to find some good advice

he never could look you in the eye
he was afraid of what you might find
he never wanted to lie
but he knew he sounded silly when he talked of the signs

one day he met a nice girl
but it had been so long since he had touched someone
he asked her to share her soul
he wondered if he could still have fun

he said...

dear girl, won't you be my friend
I like you so much and I'm scared of the end
I know I've done some things that make me sad
but I don't think I'm all that bad

she was a mystery, she was anybody
she made him laugh, and that was enough for him
they had never been alone before
but he figured that's what rooms are for

he sat alone in his room
he wondered if he was making any sense
the clock was ticking, his money was spent
was there any reason not to take a chance

dear girl, won't you be my friend
I don't know you but I'm scared of the end
I know I've done and said all kinds of stuff
but I'm still here and that's enough

dear girl, won't you be my friend
it's a big world and I'm scared of the end
I'm a sap raised on Disney endings
but I'm hoping to write my own

won't you help me
I'll help you with yours
Track Name: The Beauty of It / Hermit's Mind
how can it be, you and me
I'm still smiling, singing something

oh can it be, you know me
I'm untying my denying

can you see truth in me
I was flying, I am dying

oh canopy, so happy
I am trying, I was crying

the beauty of it is all I covet
but it flies away each dying day

one day I'll find you and I'll unwind you
we'll be free and then you'll see

and the physical world weighed on me
and the physical world laid on me
and I don't know what I want to see
and I don't know what I want to be
and my name is just a formality
and my love life is just causalities
but I march forward on broken feet
toward the beacon of your symmetry
and my name is just a formality
but will you please remember me
and the physical world weighed on me
and the physical world laid on me
and I couldn't escape it
in my blue jeans
and my t-shirt
and my slipper
and my face

putting it into song
doesn't make it not wrong

the material world is an illusion

I'm in it!

I see you standing there with your big hog
I see you with your baseball cap on
and you are holding your rifle
and you won't even smile

the material world is an illusion
what about who are you
who are you

live with me
and you'll see
we are free
as can be

I'm not gonna die
without a fight

Track Name: Feats of Strength
I am breathing
sky is up above me
time is all I see

I am teething
sweat drips along me
death is all I see

what do I have to do
to be with you
have to do what's right for me
if it's meant to be

it's a feat not exploding
but I let it happen

after what you did to me
it's all I have
you made me fall in love with you
waiting for what to do

I can't ignore a full moon

I don't want to fall in love
it'd hurt too much
but it's probably too late
because it already does

I guess I'll just have to see it through
I love you
Track Name: Tide
it's a beautiful day
the sun is bright
the sky is blue

it's a beautiful day
chasing seagulls
get my heels wet

it's a beautiful day
I have hairy legs
the hair is blonde

it's a beautiful day
wearing a yellow coat
I never knew you

it's a beautiful day
the sun is bright
the sky is blue

it's a beautiful day
and you're beautiful
Track Name: Who Knows (Biverse)
the conversation tossed and turned
like the waves of the ocean
eyes were darting like birds in the sky
every now and then they came together to fly

from different sides of the globe
who knows

I was elated, I was petrified
I didn't lie a single time
I felt free, I felt above all else
even if there was no goodbye
(just a mention of next time)

from different sides of the globe
who knows

will our universes ever combine
to make a biverse

who knows

I don't want a bye verse
I want a hi verse
a hello how are you verse
just a nice verse
give me a nice verse
that says something good about

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